Week Halfway Point: Not quite counting anymore

(First half–written Sunday morning)

I’ve noticed that my blogging is often directly related to my ability to find a seat on the morning train.  This week left me with tired limbs and no blog notes, so I’m making up for it on my Sunday ride to Kawasaki.  I’m joining a BBQ on a beautiful day that is just begging for people to spend it outside.

Yesterday, I was supposed to meet some friends for a day trip to Kamakura, but due to my miscommunication and a lack of a phone, I was unable to meet up with the group.  Truth be told, I wasnt that psyched to go, since i have already gone multiple times, and everyone wanted to do the touristy thing.  So I went shopping instead, and decided to have a relaxing night after, since I pretty much do something every other day of the week.  

However, about 20 minutes into Brave, my doorbell rang.  I thought it might have been one of my co-workers in the area, and I scrambled to find pants to put on (let’s not pretend that those of us who live alone spend their time at home clothed).  It wasn’t my co-worker, but the two other guys from my company in the same building.  They expressed their regret at not having had a neighborhood hang out yet (well, they might not have, but there are a few of us in the neighborhood who do see each other quite frequently), and went on to say they would like to amend that immediately with a trip to Abbey Road, a Beatles inspired bar down the street.  They gave me a half an hour, and went on to invite others. After some time passed, I deemed it an appropriate interval to go knock on my neighbor’s door.  As I walked in,  he informed me that everyone either was out or not interested.  And as I followed him in and saw the two Japanese girls behind him, I inwardly though, “Ohhhhh, shiiiiiiiiitsu” (there’s some Japanese for you), because I realized that the neighborhood get-together I was joining looked more like a double-date.  

In general, this isn’t sobad; but I always feel like I’m third-wheeling or fifth-wheeling (or in really crap situations, 7th-wheeling).  But I swallowed my worries and headed out.  In the end, it wasn’t so bad; one of the girlfriends got sick and left early–which of course is not a good thing, but it made me feel less like a party crasher; plus live music in an 8 person bar doesn’t really encourage a chatty atmosphere.  

However, one thing of note is that when I got to the bar, I discovered the second transgendered woman I had seen in Japan–the first one being a lady I saw at the station with some friends.  And unlike some of the really heinous men who look like done-wrong hookers (honestly, I saw one guy with a crooked wig, smeared lipstick, hairy legs in a tiny skirt, and a shirt hanging very open to reveal a clearly unnecessary bra), these were legit ladies-post-lads.  

(Second half–written Sunday night)

Please–like you guys were going to look at anyone else.

The next day, at the BBQ, we had a very interesting little situation that shows my disdain for a certain part of Japanese life.  As a foreigner, it can be a bit frustrating for me about how much Japanese people adhere to rules, especially when the reasons for them seem a bit illogical.  But a bit of context: we arrived at the riverside BBQ area to find a large queue, which we were ushered into as rules were hollered at us through a megaphone.  We lucky English speakers got our very own copy to peruse during the barrage of do’s and dont’s, and we giggled about the “breast etc. should stick” (if you don’t speak Engrish, they meant we should wear the “I paid” sticker on our chest or somewhere visible).  After we exchanged our 500 yen for our breast sticker, we met up with the group, many who had camped out early to get a good spot.  They were still trying to get the fire starting when we arrived, and the rest of us started enjoying the easy-access food and drink.  

Now, a friend of mine and her Japanese boyfriend had brought along an iPod stereo, and they started to play a little music.  Very quickly after, a riverside official (what do you call a temporary camp employee?) rushed over to tell us to turn off the music.  After a few back and forths, my friend’s boyfriend grudgingly obliged.  About 20 minutes later, when all was said and forgotten, our friend who organized the event came up and said us, “They told us we need to move our camp because we played music.”  After a few dumbfounded moments when we realized it wasn’t a joke, we started grabbing everything and made our way to a new area.  So, we had to move about 20 feet away long after we had already turned off the music.  Now, I know that rules are important to Japanese people, and that’s probably a major contributing factor as to why Japan is so safe to live in.  HOWEVER, there clearly were SEVERAL camps with blatant underage drunkenness, and yet the group that gets punished (however pathetically) is the one that played music for 5 minutes.  Way to pick and choose.  My friend and her boyfriend were so offended they left; which to be honest, really only felt like a punishment to us as their friends.  But then, it’s kind of nice to see a Japanese person who thinks about rules that are practical vs. ridiculous.

After tempers cooled and the humidity rose, we started settling in and having fun.  Kelly’s boyfriend and I had an interesting chat about my- for lack of a better term- love life.  He seemd very concerned that some guy would lie to me and take advantage of my kind nature, and he told me he was going to make a “memo” so we could have a “serious discussion” next time.  I know my…er…”situation” can be difficult for some to understand, and even though her boyfriend and I talked at length about it, I don’t think he quite understood me.  I’m not sure it was a language barrier either.  Living in a foreign country has taught me that just because you speak the same language as someone by no means guarantees that you understand each other. 

My take on BBQs in Tokyo is this: go to someplace that isn’t regulated, like the Arakawa River (good places can be reached via Akabane station or Yanasegawa).  Futakotamagawa, where we went, does have some beautiful riversides, but I would recommend going on the free side and just having a picnic over paying the 500 yen fee to have a BBQ on rocks and rules.